DON’T JUDGE, LEARN TO DISCERN

Romans 14:1-13; Matthew 7:1-12

6th Sunday after Epiphany,  February 12, 2023

The Rev. Dr. Ritva H. Williams

Welcome to Episode 3 of Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount. 

In Episodes 1 and 2 we heard Jesus proclaim that all humans, but especially the poor, grieving, hurt, marginalized, and abused are blessed and beloved, worthy of respect and dignity. We heard Jesus declare that all of us are salt for the earth, with the capacity to flavor and season, preserve and purify, heal and make whole the relationships and spaces in which we live and work, play and worship. We heard Jesus remind us that we are the light of the world that cannot be hidden.

Today, we explore what Jesus means when he urges us not to judge.  

One possible response to Jesus’ words, “do not judge” might be something like the response of Ben, a business executive in Marilee Adams’ book Change Your Questions, Change Your Life. When told he needed to stop judging, he protested: 

“You make it sound like any kind of judgment is a bad thing. But I disagree. I could never do my job without making judgments … [about] technological choices … choosing vendors to buy from … assigning the best person to do a certain job.”

Here Ben is describing and defending the practice of making good choices which is more accurately called discernment. Both Jesus and God want us to practice discernment. In fact, discernment is one of the gifts of the Holy Spirit. Discernment emerges together with other spiritual gifts such as wisdom, knowledge, and understanding, and strengthens the spiritual gifts of leadership and administration (1 Corinthians 12:8-10; Romans 12:6-8). 

So when Jesus says “do not judge” he is not talking about discernment but about something different, something more like an incident described by Rob Bell in his book Love Wins. He writes:

Several years ago we had an art show at our church on what it means to be a peacemaker. One woman included in her work a quote from Mahatma Gandhi, which a number of people found quite compelling. But not everyone. Someone attached a piece of paper to it. On the piece of paper was written: "Reality check: He's in hell.” 

Bell’s response to that note was: “Really? Gandhi's in hell? He is? We have confirmation of this? Somebody knows this? Without a doubt?And that somebody decided to take on the responsibility of letting the rest of us know?”

The note left by the unknown person judges and condemns a person of a different faith tradition. It is judgmental. This is the kind of judging that Jesus warns us about.

Judging, condemning, criticizing, dissing others emerges from what Marilee Adams calls our “Judger mindset.” This Judger mindset is part of being human. We all slip into it from time to time, especially when things aren’t going well. The Judger mindset is habit forming, even addictive. The more we indulge it the more it takes over our thought processes. The Judger mindset is the enemy of discernment — making good choices. The Judger mindset is always negative, always judgmental. 

The Judger mindset has two faces. One face is judgmental toward others, the other face is judgmental toward ourselves. When focused on ourselves, our inner Judger undermines our self-confidence and self-esteem telling us that we losers, we can’t do anything right, there’s no point to doing anything at all. Our inner Judger can drive us into depression and worse. When our Judger mindset zooms in on the people around us, all we see are their faults — how stupid, insensitive and frustrating they are. Our Judger mindset pushes us into anger, resentment, hostility, and even conflict.  Jesus describes this reality beautifully when he asks, “Why do you see the speck in your  neighbor’s eye, but do not notice the log in your own eye?” Why do you see all your neighbor’s faults, but don’t see your own negative thought process.

Jesus knows that all of us have a Judger mindset, and that is why he warns us against judging and condemning one another. Jesus says, “with the judgment you make you will be judged, and the measure you give will be the measure you get.” His point is that there are real world consequences for what we think, say, and do when in Judger mode. We will reap what we sow (Galatians 6:7).

Our reading from Paul’s letter to the Romans also addresses the issue of judging one another. Paul is dealing with real-life issues that folks in the church at Rome were quarreling about: eating meat and observing the sabbath day. Church members choices were rooted in ethnically-specific religious and cultural practices they had been raised in. The result was that Jewish followers of Jesus continued to keep the Sabbath on  Saturday, and refused to eat meat that was not kosher. Christ-followers of Greek, Roman, and other ethnicities continued to take their Sabbaths on different days, eat pork, and buy meat left over from sacrifices to the gods of city and state. 

Paul asks these church members, “who are you to pass judgment?” None of us has the power and authority to decide who’s saved and who’s not. And surprise: none of us gets to make our ethnic, cultural, religious or even spiritual practices mandatory for someone else’s salvation. Paul insists that every person is accountable before God for their own thoughts, words, and actions, not those of others. Each one of us must stand or fall on our own before God. The good news is that Christ is able and willing to make us stand. 

Jesus says, take the log out of our own eye, then you will see clearly. If the log in our eye, is our Judger mindset bolstered by our implicit biases and prejudices how can we make it go away? Here’s what we have going for us. First we are all created in the image of God. All of us have built into our DNA the capacity to receive and exercise the spiritual gifts of wisdom, knowledge, and discernment. Second, the Holy Spirit is constantly calling and inviting us to open our hearts and minds so She can stir up, nurture and nourish our God-given capacity for discernment.

Marilee Adam calls this capacity the Learner mindset (others call it a growth mindset) — and we all have it. As she puts it, Learner ears listen for understanding and facts, what’s valuable, and what’s possible so we can discern how to move forward.  When focused inward, the Learner mindset does not play the blame and shame game — that’s a Judger routine that leaves us stuck in the past. Instead, the Learner mindset asks, “What am I responsible for now in this moment? What are my choices? What is possible? That’s how we learn to discern how to make a positive difference in the world for us and for our neighbors. 

Reading Adams through a Lutheran lens, we are simultaneously both Judgers and Learners. We cannot eliminate our Judger mindset, but we can tame it by practicing our Learner mindset. Adams  writes, “At nearly every moment of our lives, we’re faced with choosing between taking the Learner or Judger path … by choosing the Learner mindset we can discover new possibilities. By jumping into Judger mindset we eventually end up stuck in the mud” (p. 41)

The good news is that in dealing with our Judger mindset Jesus gives us a promise and a rule. The promise is that if we ask, search, and knock God-Christ-Holy Spirit will guide us away from Judger into Learner. The rule is the golden rule: in everything do to others as you would have them do to you. 

So today, we pray for the commitment and strength to always treat other people with the same respect and dignity, kindness and compassion we ourselves yearn to receive. Lord make it so. Amen.